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Dear Marc,

You are amazing. I love everything about you. And there's nothing in this world I wouldn't do for you. I'd never forget the day we met, three years ago. You were starving yourself just to make a record. I always told you, "MUSIC ISN'T EVERYTHING MARC!!" and you'd laugh it off. Saying I didn't know what I was talking about.

Now I look at you, and I am amazed. You tour the world, and everyone loves your music. You are so amazing. I absolutely love you. But why aren't I with you? thats the question you ask constantly, and the answer I neglect to give you is this:

Since day one Marc, I've been asked to be someone I am not truly. My mom wants me to have lots of kids, my dad wants me to run all his businesses and my siblings all want to use me to their disposal. And the last thing I need in my life is someone else to deglect me from who I am. Being with you for just three weeks, I saw how my entire days had to be dedicated to you. And I had to wait on you. I don't wait around for anyone. I won't allow myself. And the future holds imprtant events but you won't be here because you'll be in Germany. I can't leave my job, to be with you and I can't stop living to be the wife of a rockstar. I will not lead you on in such a way, that would lead to bad karma to me, and heartbreak for you.

So thats why, I didn't say yes and thats why I can not be with you.